A Word to the Wise- The Words We Say
A Word to the Wise-The Words We Say
Proverbs 4:23
Sermon Recap
This past Sunday we talked about wisdom and our words—and why Proverbs takes them so seriously. According to Proverbs, wisdom isn’t just about what we say, but how we listen, what we tolerate, and what we excuse.
A fool, in Proverbs, isn’t only someone who speaks recklessly. A fool is also someone who refuses to take words seriously—their own or someone else’s. Wisdom listens closely. Wisdom notices patterns. Wisdom doesn’t rush to explain away repeated words with phrases like, “They didn’t really mean it,” or “They’re just joking,” or “That’s just how they talk.”
Words reveal what’s going on inside us. Jesus says the mouth speaks from what the heart is full of. That means our words don’t just express our hearts—they also shape them. Over time, the words we speak become the house we live in.
In a loud, reactive, and often cruel culture, Proverbs invites us to try a better way. Not silence. Not passivity. But intentional, careful, truthful speech that participates with God in bringing life instead of destruction.
---Go a Little Deeper
Words as Power, Not Just Information
In the world of Proverbs, words are never neutral. Speech is an act of power—it can heal or wound, build or destroy, bless or curse. That’s why Proverbs says things like:
· “Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Proverbs 18:21)
· “Reckless words pierce like a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18)
Wisdom assumes that words do something in the world.
Wisdom Listens as Much as It Speaks
One of the overlooked themes in Proverbs is that wisdom is just as concerned with how we receive words as how we speak them.
· “The wise listen to advice” (Proverbs 12:15)
· “To answer before listening—that is folly and shame” (Proverbs 18:13)
Wisdom pays attention to what words reveal—especially when they are repeated. Patterns of speech are rarely accidental. Over time, they tell the truth about what’s really there.
Why We Explain Words Away
Proverbs repeatedly warns against self-deception. One of the most common ways we deceive ourselves is by minimizing or rationalizing words that should concern us—either our own or someone else’s.
We often explain words away because:
· We don’t want conflict
· We don’t want to admit we were wrong
· We don’t want to reckon with what those words might mean
But wisdom has the courage to let words mean what they plainly mean—and to respond honestly.
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Discussion Questions
When you hear the phrase “words have power,” what comes to mind for you? Do you tend to believe that, or shrug it off?
Are you more likely to struggle with speaking wisely or listening wisely? Why do you think that is?
Can you think of a time when words spoken to you—good or bad—stuck longer than you expected?
The sermon talked about how we often explain away repeated words. Where do you see yourself most tempted to do that?
Proverbs suggests that wisdom pays attention to patterns, not just moments. What patterns of speech do you notice in yourself lately?
How might your words be shaping the kind of person you are becoming?
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Suggested Practice
The Awareness Practice
For one day this week, simply notice your words.
You don’t need to correct them yet. Just pay attention.
· What do you tend to say when you’re tired?
· When you’re stressed?
· When you feel threatened or defensive?
· When you feel safe?
At the end of the day, ask:
What do my words reveal about what’s going on inside me right now?
If you’re feeling brave, write down one sentence you said that you wish you could take back—and one sentence you said that you’re glad you spoke.
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Closing Prayer
God of wisdom,
You spoke the world into being, and you speak life where we expect death.
Teach us to take our words seriously— not with fear, but with care.
Slow our speech. Open our ears. Soften our hearts.
May our words become places of refuge, truth, and healing.
Amen.